One of the components of happiness in life is learning to tolerate and accept the irksome imperfections in life. Your happiness cannot depend on or be determined by a pre-decided set of circumstances. You must learn to be happy in spite of the situation.
You cannot legislate how people should feel or think but you can legislate how they behave. There have been governments throughout history who have tried mind control and used punishments to force their citizens to conform without success.
Accept other people’s right to their own beliefs. If you are unwilling or unable to tolerate another’s beliefs, you must still be open-minded, understanding and sympathetic and you must respect their right to their beliefs, even if you think they are wrong, intolerable, unbearable and offensive. They might feel the same way about your beliefs.
To be happy you need to be patient, kind, empathetic and full of good will towards others. Allow them the rights they are entitled to under American law.
Tolerance is frequently about courtesy, civility and respect, respect for yourself and for others. If you are intolerant then you are being narrow, bigoted, dogmatic and prejudiced. Some dictionaries include stupidity as part of the definition of intolerance. Intolerance is also about hate for everything that is different and for everything that you do not understand and cannot control. If you are intolerant you are threatened by other’s beliefs. A lack of tolerance makes you a small, pathetic, desperate person. Lack of tolerance prevents you from being truly happy which is sad and unhealthy for you in the long run. It is aggravating and frustrating and prevents you from ultimately having peace and serenity in your life. If you need others to validate your beliefs, you will be on a slippery slope because you will be dependent on others for your happiness.
Lack of tolerance is insidious creeping into all aspects of your relationships with your family, friends, co-workers and your political belief system.
Patricia Frank is a Licensed Psychotherapist. She can be reached at 305-788-4864, Psychotherapy.a2z@gmail.com.
