[dropcap]T[/dropcap]he other morning while reading the news I actually had tears in my eyes, a rarity for me.
I first began reading about a cute little 3-year old boy who had been brutally beaten and left for dead stuffed into trash bags in a laundry room.
If that wasn’t enough the next story on the front page was about a little 10-year-old boy who had been playing basketball and was shot through the head. I continued thinking about this and searching for a solution to the problem. I found one.
By now everyone knows that soon I will be termed out as an elected official and can no longer run for the normal public offices available to citizens. Instead I decided that I would run for dictator. These are some of my first actions.
I would ban the possession of all guns by everyone except the police and the Army. Everyone else would eventually have to turn their weapons or be subject to jail. It will take many years to filter all of these guns out of our system but eventually I think it will help.
I don’t want to deal with Marion Hammer and all those Second Amendment folks who refuse to see the original purpose of this amendment which was to allow our country to have a well-regulated militia. I think the Army and the police fit that category well.
As for everyone else, if they must fire a gun, allow them to go to the many gun ranges available, pay for the use of one of their weapons, take their targets home to show how good they are and then go back to a normal life.
Try this: Ask anyone that you know that has owned guns for many years just how many have been stolen from them. You will be surprised at how many people will answer in the affirmative. These bad guys shooting kids on basketball courts aren’t going into Kmart or Sports Authority and buying these weapons — at least I hope not.
As for hunters, if they must go out and kill an animal to provide food for their family, they should pass a strict examination and only be allowed a single shot weapon without a silencer that at least allows the animals some hope of escape. I frankly do not see the need for all these automatic weapons that have flooded the marketplace based on our Second Amendment rights. It is time to put an end to this. As for the 3-year-old boy, and the many other stories that I read about where kids have been killed, tortured, injured, by parents who are either mad at each other or just plain mad. Here is my dictator ruling on that.
In order to have a child you must prove to a board appointed by me that you are capable of raising a child, have not been involved with drugs or alcohol to any large extent and appreciate the wonderful miracle of birth.
You would be required, just as our kids in school, to take a difficult exam to prove that you are worthy. If not, once the child is delivered it would immediately be taken away from you and placed in an orphanage or foster home where at least they will have a chance to grow up normally.
As much as we dislike the rules in China about having more than one child, it has worked for the most part so I see no reason why we cannot extend it to any child. In China, if you do have that second child ,you lose all of the benefits that the country has to offer you, including college education, medical care, etc.
With me as dictator there would be no budget problems anywhere. Think how much money would be saved if I were offered just a normal salary for my job and did not require a House of Representatives, a Senate, a city council or commission and all the other accoutrements of what we call democracy. I would bet that would leave millions, if not billions, of dollars to be spent on these children that would be taken from unfit parents.
It is easy to blame DCF and all the other agencies supposedly responsible for what goes on in our society but the truth is they will do anything to avoid taking a child away from its parents. This is obvious, by reading the newspapers lately, and would cease to be a problem under my dictatorship.
I, with my infinite wisdom, would see that things are done properly. I could even run the entire state or possibly country from my home office. Just think how much that would save our government in real estate alone.
A few of you may think this is a bizarre concept, but please, if you have a better solution let me know and I will take it under advisement with my staff (me). If they allow room on the next election ballot simply write in “Ernie for dictator.” If I get enough votes, we may not need to have another election for many years to come.
To contact Ernie or read more go to his website at www.sochin.com.