We all have been guilty of what I’m about to share. After all, we are all flawed beings looking to become the best version of ourselves. So, please receive my message and do not return to sender.
I recently had a great discussion with Coach Norbert, the women’s head basketball coach from Dillard University. We were sharing best practices in basketball and in life for the student-athletes we influence. After a while, our conversation turned to how to best motivate others. My take on motivation is that it doesn’t work; it is an external force that drives us toward obtaining rather than sustaining. When we cannot obtain what we strive for, we forget our motivational techniques and revert to our Ego.
Our Ego creates illusions in our mind and then uses trickery to make us believe those illusions are reality. It places a CAP (Compare And Projection) on us, limiting our desires. Anytime someone says, “You need to be more like _______,” they are imposing their CAP on you. When you fall for this, the Ego wins and you lose your focus.
DJ Khalid, a popular music industry artist, mentions the word “THEY” a lot. He says things like, “THEY don’t want you to succeed.” or “THEY don’t love you no more.” So, who are THEY?
Here is my humble suggestion of who THEY are:
Time – Wasted being aimless and preoccupied. When you listen to your Ego, you are in distraction mode and take no action. Many people claim they can multi-task, but that is a myth. Your brain can only process basic information a little at a time, so stop kidding yourself.
Headaches – Stress endures when the Ego encourages you to waste time. Headaches appear because all you can think about is what’s being pushed off. You want to numb the pain the Ego makes you think you are feeling, instead of taking action on your priorities. You always have tomorrow, right?
Enemy – Your own worst critic lives inside you. When you have self-deprecating thoughts, they tend to spiral out of control unless you make a conscious effort to stop them. These thoughts come from the enemy you should be familiar with by now, your Ego.
You – This all leads to…You! You are the only one completely in control of your time, your headaches, and your Ego. In order to push forward, you have to ignore your Ego and the external “motivating” factors. Just be YOU!
So, the next time you think about THEY, inspire yourself from within with these affirmations:
THEY want me to overcome obstacles.
THEY want me to be great.
THEY want me to succeed.
THEY love me.
And for the record, THEY are YOU!
Charlie Miller is an entrepreneur, public speaker, and master basketball trainer. He has owned his business, ATTACK Basketball Academy, for six years and is passionate about mentoring the youth of today. You can contact him by email at firstname.lastname@example.org