[dropcap]R[/dropcap]umor has it that The Muppets are making a comeback and in a big way.
Not that they ever really left our collective imagination and admiration…but ABC is in talks to develop a revival of the much loved cast of, well, kooky characters.
You know them well. They were a product of our youth, only a more hip and happening group of puppets than Sesame Street ever boasted.
Sure, I learned to tie my shoes and say please and thank you for the biggest of yellow feathered birds, but it was pretty cool.
When Oscar the Grouch and Cookie Monster were replaced with the endearing Fozzie Bear, Kermit the Frog and the inimitable and irascible Miss Piggy.
That’s right…the karate chopping, vitriol spewing, plump and positively persnickety and pampered pig will be ready for her latest closeup in 2015. Now, not too close!
I have missed The Muppets dearly, even with their occasional movies hitting the big screen as a way to keep them in our hearts, if not so much top of mind.
Nothing has been able to replace their weekly entrée into our private homes to cheer us up at even the darkest of hours.
But the reality is Miss Piggy (or her eerily familiar doppelgangers) never really went away completely. She was substituted for by an amalgamation of modern-day haters often masquerading as “journalists,” hiding behind a thick wall of fiction and folly.
Even at her worst, Miss Piggy could charm the pants off a fellow muppet or some handsome co-star making a guest appearance. She had some mad skills, that pig.
Heck, she even appeared on the Oscars with Whoopie Goldberg (LIVE!), traded barbs with Joan Rivers off the red carpet, got physical like Jane Fonda with her own brand of “snackercize” and told it like it was to the omnipresent Larry King!
She was timeless, like a colorful Lily Pullitzer schmata.
But sadly, while she was on hiatus, her legitimate star turns have been replaced by wannabes, political hacks and part-time “bloggers” who strangely enough look and act like Miss Piggy, but end up merely basted in their own repugnance.
And no matter how hard they tried and how much they bent the truth, they failed to bring forth the charm that the oinked one could always produce.
Oh, how I have missed the real thing — the one true Miss Piggy. Thank goodness ABC is taking another run at providing a legitimate platform for her royal porkness. She will literally skewer the competition and remind us why we have always loved the other white meat.
I have no doubt that she will be even more modern, which a touch of old world charm that reminds us why we fell in love with her the first time.
I hear she may even have a Twitter or Instagram account in which to share her favorite — well — porcine thoughts.
I have a feeling her first Tweet might sound something like this:
“Haters gonna hate; they always gonna be a step 2 late; the real thing aint nothing sedate cuz Miss Piggy’s gonna rate! #muppets #ilovekermie”
Welcome home, Miss Piggy. We have missed you!
