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So….what grade would you give your holiday season? Would it rank a B+? Or a C-…or something else? If you are anything like me, you went into last month with a degree of sobering expectation. You knew things would be different in 2020—there would be activities and traditions you would miss. You were aware of annual gatherings you always anticipate, that would not happen this time around. There would be people you would not see. And much as you braced yourself for losses such as these, you wondered what living through an emptier holiday season would truly be like.
Well, here we are on the other side of it all. A new year has begun, and the holidays are behind us. January has arrived—the month named after Janus, the ancient Roman god of beginnings and endings. Janus is typically depicted as having two faces—one looking forward and the other looking back. So even as you move on to 2021 and focus on the present and future, I invite you also to take a moment and look back. To reflect on your expectations versus your lived experience. Amidst the parts of the holiday season you missed and lamented, where were there unexpected joys?
Perhaps the diminished activity helped you to focus more deeply on the true meaning of the season. Maybe the inability to travel brought reduced stress, fewer crowds, and no long lines in which to wait. Perhaps you noticed anew what a beautiful community you live in. Maybe by missing loved ones this year, you came to a greater appreciation for staying connected…and your resolve to give relationships top priority is more firmly in place.
Whatever our circumstance, there are important things we can learn and ways we can grow. But for these to happen, we need to set aside time to reflect upon the events of our lives. Do some honest assessment. To be sure, this may cause us to relive some disappointments or setbacks, yet we also might become aware of good things that caught us by surprise. And no matter what we discover, we can use what we learn, to help us handle what’s next. May your gaze into the past yield a future of new possibility.
Kathryn Carroll offers one-on-one coaching, listening and support for individuals facing transitions and dilemmas. Learn more by visiting www.conversationswithkatie.org or emailing her at conversationswithkatie@gmail.com.
