There’s Only One Way to Fix Crazy Joe Carollo

Is Joe Carollo crazy… or crazy like a fox?
Joe Carollo
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Grant Miller

Ever since the owners of the Ball & Chain saloon backed Joe Carollo’s opponent in his election, His Dishonor has sacrificed no opportunity to try to get revenge.  This time, Joe has gone too far.  He has shot himself in the foot, reloaded, and emptied another clip.

Joe Carollo isn’t a lawyer. He likes people to think he was a cop, but he was more like a glorified security guard at Miami International Airport. He’s proven that he’s never read the City of Miami Charter.  The law is beyond his meager powers of comprehension.

Section 4(d) of the Miami City Charter puts strict limits on what Commissioners can and can’t do when it comes to the City administration. The City government is a manager/mayor and commissioner form of government.  Commissioners are to deal only with the administrative sector solely through the City Manager. Commissioners are forbidden from giving “orders to any of the subordinates of the city manager, city attorney, city clerk and independent auditor general, either publicly or privately.” The cost of disobeying this clear direction is high. It entails a fine of up to $500.00, imprisonment for up to 60 days or both, and the miscreant can be forced from office.

Back in 2018 before the COVID-19 pandemic, Joe Carollo was found with the former Chairman of the City of Miami Code Enforcement Board, lurking behind the Ball and Chain lobbying neighbors to file false noise complaints against the bar.   This was corroborated on video with the neighbors acknowledging Carollo’s actions and negating any issues with respect to noise coming from the business.  After being caught on camera and called out by various local news organizations, Joe should have learned his lesson.

He didn’t.

Crazy Joe has been at it again, commandeering neighbors to call in false noise complaints.  On October 9, 2020, the first weekend night the Ball and Chain reopened after the COVID closures, code enforcement, police, and the fire department showed up under the guise of a purported noise complaint.

However, the Director of Miami’s Code Enforcement office revealed that Crazy Joe Carollo had called directly to the heads of these various City departments demanding that all measure of law enforcement be sent out to the bar.

Keep in mind that Joe was already hauled into the federal Southern District Court for usurping Emilio Gonzalez’s authority under the City Charter. The City has a new Manager now, but Joe is up to his old tricks. If Joe had his way, the City of Miami would be unmoored from the Florida peninsula and set out to sea where he could stomp around in old army boots and olive drab fatigues, giving orders while pretending he was the law.

Since the City is still firmly attached, he’s trying to do the next best thing. He’s proposed two ordinances. Carollo’s Proposed Ordinance 8049 would prohibit outdoor music after 8:00 pm for any commercial business that shares a property line with residential property.  The only two business that meet that definition are Ball and Chain and Taquerias El Mexicano the same owners. No other businesses in the City will be impacted by the proposed legislation.

Proposed Ordinance 8025 would give the City’s Zoning Director the power to revoke a business’ certificate of use for a variety of reasons including violations of the Building Code. Crazy Joe wants to make the Zoning Department into a vicious pitbull, with Carollo at the other end of the leash.  Both proposed ordinances are aimed directly at Ball and Chain and Taquerias El Mexicano and their management.  In fact, what all of this clearly amounts to is another example of Crazy Joe working the system to further his own personal vendettas with the help of his puppets and the shady City Attorney.  Ultimately, if passed, these will not just cost the City millions in new investments, it will cost the taxpayers tens of millions in damages and legal fees.

There comes a time when dealing with a bad dog requires more than the slap of a newspaper across the snout.  Joe needs to be fixed as quickly as possible, with a sharp legal scalpel.  The State Attorney should begin proceedings that will lead to the Commissioner’s arrest, conviction, and imprisonment. He needs to be removed from office.

None of them have ever successfully run a business, launched a new venture or contributed one dollar of business revenue to assist the tax payers that they serve.  To the contrary, they have commandeered our local government to use it for their own , to destroy hardworking business people and to receive and repay political favors.  The fact that Carollo would be so cavalier as to take these actions in such a public forum, with the knowledge that he is the subject of an ongoing Federal litigation in which he has already been denied qualified immunity is what is really so brazen.  In short, the Revolution is alive and well in the City of Miami under the direction of its leader Crazy Joe Carollo.


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